"Detach From The Outcome. Attach To The Progress."

In the first episode of a special four-part WORD MATTER series on FOCUS, Deanna Ley, The Catalytic Coach, explores her own transformative quote: “Detach from the outcome. Attach to the progress.”

Deanna dives into the struggle of being outcome-obsessed and shares how letting go of rigid expectations can open doors to unexpected joy and new opportunities. Through a personal story about a hiking trip gone awry, she illustrates the power of flexibility, celebrating progress, and staying present in the moment. This episode is packed with relatable insights and actionable tips to help you release the pressure of perfection and find fulfillment in the journey itself.

What Listeners Will Learn:
• How to break free from being outcome-obsessed and embrace the beauty of the journey.
• The importance of flexibility and seeing detours as opportunities.
• Why celebrating progress is more meaningful than chasing perfection.
• Practical steps to detach from rigid goals and anchor yourself to growth.
• How to find joy in the moment and stay inspired for the long haul.

Memorable Quotes:
• “Detach from the outcome. Attach to the progress.”
• “Discipline your disappointment.”
• “Progress isn’t about perfection—it’s about movement, forward momentum, and showing up day after day.”
• “Appreciate the entire path, not just the view from the top.”
• “And when you finally reach that destination—whether it’s a goal, milestone, or dream—you’ll realize it’s not the destination itself that matters most. It’s who you became and what you experienced along the way that will stay with you forever.”

This episode inspires listeners to shift from being outcome-focused to finding inspiration in their progress, dedication in their process, and joy in every step of the journey.

To learn more about Deanna's journey, explore her latest projects, and join her thriving community, visit https://deannaley.com.

Your WORDS MATTER because YOU MATTER.

❤️❤️❤️

Let me know if you'd like to refine or expand on any part of this! 🌟

Transcript

Hi, hello, and welcome back to WORDS MATTER. Today, we're kicking off the very first episode in a special four-part series all about FOCUS. Each episode over the next four weeks is thoughtfully designed to help you shift your perspective, sharpen your focus, and step fully into your Possible.

Today's quote is one that I had to learn the hard way. It’s my very own, and it’s completely reshaped how I approach my life: “Detach from the outcome. Attach to the progress.”

Friend, are you outcome-obsessed? Do you find yourself so consumed by that end goal that you miss everything beautiful along the way? Maybe you’ve worked so hard to reach a specific destination only to get there and think, Is this it? Is this all there is?

It leaves you feeling let down and disappointed because it didn’t bring you the joy and fulfillment you imagined. How often do you rush past the moments that truly matter because your eyes are so fixated on that imaginary finish line?

Do you ever find yourself thinking, I’ll be happy when… I’ll be proud of myself when… I’ll be successful when… only to get there and feel like something’s still missing?

Well, here’s the thing: We live in a culture that glorifies achievement. We’re taught very early on to tie our success, happiness, and even self-worth to whether or not we achieve a specific result. It’s no wonder we become outcome-obsessed.

But when we focus too much on an end goal, we lose sight of the journey along the way. We miss the lessons, the growth, and the joy that can only be found in the process itself.

As someone who’s battled most of her life being outcome-focused, I had this lesson really driven home for me in August of 2022.

Most of you know Chris and I are avid hikers. I spend so much time poring over the AllTrails app and hiking blogs, preparing us for each hike. I love the research part—it fits my personality so well.

Because of that preparation, by the time we step foot on the trail I’ve chosen for the day, I’m fully convinced it’s going to be time and gas well spent. It’s going to be everything we love about hiking.

I had my eye on a seven-miler at McCully Heritage Project in Hardin, Illinois, for quite some time. I spent so much time ensuring it was going to be perfect. I was thrilled to read the reviews and see that it checked all our boxes:

• Scenic? Check.
• Challenging? Check.
• Dog-friendly? Check.

We set out that day with anticipation and excitement. To say I had my hopes up for what the day would be is an understatement. An hour and fifteen minutes from home, we drove with everything we needed.

We stepped onto the trail, fully prepared—mind, body, and soul—for the picture-perfect hiking day.

Well, about a quarter-mile in, we rounded a bend, and my heart sank. The trail was completely overgrown with tall grass, and being August in the Midwest, that meant one thing: ticks.

Even though our dogs are treated with a tick preventative, this was too big of a risk. We craned our necks, hoping to see if the tall grass ended, but it stretched as far as we could see.

We had no choice but to turn back after barely getting started.

I was crushed. All that planning, all that excitement, gone in an instant.

Chris suggested an alternative—hiking at Pere Marquette State Park, which we had passed on the way. I was so attached to the day I’d envisioned that I couldn’t see the new opportunity in front of me. My frustration clouded everything.

Eventually, I gave in. We made our way to Pere Marquette, and begrudgingly, I stepped onto that new trail, still holding on to my disappointment.

And then, out of nowhere, I heard Tony Robbins’ voice in my head saying, “Discipline your disappointment, Deanna.”

Yikes. Discipline your disappointment.

That Tony Robbins quote couldn’t have come at a more opportune time.

In that moment, those words stopped being just something I’d heard before and became a decision I had to make.

I realized, right there at the Pere Marquette trailhead, that I had a choice. I could let unmet expectations ruin my entire day, or I could let go of what I thought the day should be and open myself to what it could be.

And you know what? That hike turned out to be incredible—scenic, challenging, pet-friendly, and no ticks. It was everything I didn’t know I needed.

Because I didn’t allow the disappointment to ruin that day, that trail has become one of my favorite local trails for a great workout or clearing my head.

What started as a huge disappointment opened the door to something even better.

So, why do we get so attached to outcomes?

It’s human nature to crave certainty. We want to know our efforts will lead to a specific result. We imagine that future in vivid detail and cling to that vision because it gives us a sense of control.

But life doesn’t always go as planned. And when our reality doesn’t meet our expectations, we feel frustrated, disappointed, and even lost.

Here’s the truth: Being attached to an outcome keeps us stuck. It blinds us to new possibilities and prevents us from finding fulfillment in the moment.

When we detach from the outcome, we free ourselves from the pressure of perfection. We stop tying our happiness, success, and self-worth to whether or not we achieve a specific result.

Instead, we make space—space to experience the journey for what it is: a series of steps, each one meaningful in its own way.

So how do you apply this to your life?

1. Embrace flexibility.
   Life doesn’t always go as planned, and that’s okay. Be open to detours, pivots, and unexpected opportunities. They might just lead to something better than you originally envisioned.
2. Celebrate your progress.
   Take time to notice how far you’ve come, even if you’re not where you want to be yet. Progress isn’t about perfection—it’s about movement, forward momentum, and showing up day after day.
3. Stay present.
   Let yourself find joy in the moment you’re in right now. The small wins, the quiet moments, and the lessons you’re learning—these make the journey meaningful.
4. Have a vision for what’s next.
   Life isn’t about reaching one summit and stopping. It’s about continuing to climb, explore, and grow. When you know your next mile marker, you stay inspired and engaged.

As you go through this week, I challenge you: Take a deep breath. Let go of the weight of the outcome in your head and anchor yourself to the beauty of progress instead.

Be inspired by the possibilities and dedicated to the process. Let yourself find joy in every step—even the challenging ones.

Appreciate the entire path, not just the view from the top.

“Detach from the outcome. Attach to the progress.”

When you focus on the progress, every step becomes meaningful. Every step is a reminder that you’re moving forward, growing, and becoming the person you’re meant to be.

And when you finally reach that destination—whether it’s a goal, milestone, or dream—you’ll realize it’s not the destination itself that matters most.

It’s who you became and what you experienced along the way that will stay with you forever.

Friends, the words we see and read, the words we hear, and the words we say to ourselves about ourselves—what we’re doing and how we’re doing it—they all matter.

Your WORDS MATTER because YOU MATTER.

I’ll see you next week for part two of this special four-part series on FOCUS. We’ll continue exploring another powerful quote to help you shift your perspective and sharpen your focus so you can step fully into your Possible.

Until then, have a great day.